Bells fell asleep before sunset tonight. It would have been nice to kick back with Ben, in our chairs, and talk as the sun dropped down over the trees and the fish jumped in and out of the water. Ben should come home, I miss him.
With the deck so lonely, I came inside and decided to clean out Ruth's dreaded ART cabinet. Three hours later I feel pretty accomplished. I also feel a tiny bit guilty about the bowl of Peanut Butter Captain Crunch that just disappeared (but that's a story for another day).
Back to the art cabinet. I secretly like her. She's where I keep my old journals... the ones I carry around with me everywhere. And cleaning her out means I get to sift through years of funny observations, thoughts, insights, and cool stuff. Sifting is good. It reminds me of where I've been and helps me focus on who I am.
Tonight, I opened the journal from my first months in Florida...
February 12, 2009
A friend's comment on my blog titled "Blah, Blah, Blah..."
I have no idea why you needed Florida, but I think eventually it will come to you! These things always have a way of making themselves apparent when we aren't grasping for the answer.
It's taken a few years but I'm starting to see it.
I met someone this year who's taught me a lot. I write down half of everything she says in the bright pink journal. The last thing she told me before I packed up for summer vacation?
"I don't need two doors. I need one door - that way I know I'm going the right way."
Some things are beyond our control and they are beyond our control for a reason - - there is a plan even if we do not always see or understand it.
Which brings me to this... every time I listen to this song it reminds me of the person I met this year who taught me a lot and everything she's taught me.
Thank you.
You are proof that everything really does happen for a reason and we are given what we need when it is needed.
Love,
me
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